#somebody make me go to sleep
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It's 2 am for me and I am an absolute insomniac at the moment so I thought I'd do a lil sketch of one of my favorite parts of @somerandomdudelmao's comic. I fucking love lil donnie in this but robo Raph is a bit easier for me to draw. Especially since this is my first time drawing one of the turtles lol.
#somerandomdudelmao fanart#rottmnt#rise raph#fanart#rottmnt fanart#somebody make me go to sleep#send help
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Sleeping on a sofa rn, anyone have a bed I can borrow 😉😋
#not the first time I'll spend a week on somebody else couch#friends moved away a while back so im at thier place rn#theyre nor rly my friends tho r they#theyre the guy who im sleeping withs friends#i dont have friends#which is fine ig#makes it easier when they go away ykno#im being depressing#and i have issues#mine#me#selfie#alternative#alt#blonde#glasses#girl#boy#couch surfing
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Ok Halloween Havoc is serving
Scott Hall vs Kevin Nash
If y'all need me, imma be watching this match on repeat. I really could not care less about the rest of the matches at this point.
#scott hall#kevin nash#reedsy watches wcw#wrestling#wcw#Halloween Havoc 98#that LOOK#I need him to look at me like that#for....science#and the science is bang-ology#somebody make me go to bed#clearly I need sleep
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cramps so bad I'm about to make the Tom & Jerry "YEOWCH" sound
#i am once again sleep deprived#somebody save me#i do NOT wanna go to school like this#i go to that wretched place with migraines i go with one hour of sleep i go with leg pain arm pain stomachaches#i force myself out of bed daily to go to that nightmare realm.#even on my period with my nightmarish cramps that make me wanna grab a knife and rip my uterus out.#im dying to death over here#the only times i ever got to stay home from school because of any problems is because i was either late or it was just worse than usual#im convinced i live in some kind of torture chamber where i have no choice but to be in constant pain#and even through that constant pain i have to get up and be a human being or else i fail life altogether#all i ask is being able to rest when i need it thats all i want and i never get it without some sense of shame for being perceived as “lazy”#i cant even say “just one day” or “just this once” because ive done it a million times#a million times i couldnt force myself up one morning. a million times i suffered for being unable to exist normally.#i just want rest.#but even in rest i cant rest.#sprinkles says shit
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*shaking you violently, staring into your eyes in a almost crazed way*
IM A LITTLE KID AND SO ARE YOU DONT YOU GO AND GROW UP BEFORE I DO IM A LITTLE KID WITH SO MUCH DOUBT DO YOU WANNA BE THERE TO SEE HOW I TURN OUTTTT
#DO YOU UNDERSTAND?!?!?!!?#AAAAUAUGHHHHH#this song seriously makes me want to fucking SCREAM#I LOVE OT SO KUCH IM SCREAMING HOLLERING BEOCOMJNG VIOLENT#I’m rather sleep deprived and aparrantly that makes me have very strong feelings about the turning out trilogy#bashing my head against a brick wall but out of love#babes and theys I PROMSIE I’m normal about this song#so not going to bite somebody rn#ajr#ajr brothers#turning out#still turning out
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had a super fucking seamless transition from sleeping to being awake just now which would be FINE if it hadn't been a FUCKING NIGHTMARE. like to the point I had to turn the lights on to make sure there's nobody in here with me.
somebody was on top of me and hurting me and it was completely dark and I could feel their breath on my face... and suddenly the breath went away like they just leaned back and it took me a bit to realize I'd woken up bc I was lying in that exact same position & still in pain like there was somebody putting their weight on me, but turns out the position I was lying in is what gave me that pain and my subconscious was trying to tell me that I guess?!
next time just wake me up or turn me around, thanks...
#also i changed from a thinner blanket to a thicker blanket tonight so that helped bc#more weight on me obviously PLUS too hot like somebody's body heat has been added. time to change to thinner pj's so I'll stop overheating#doddie träumt#doddie redet#🌃#ok now I'm going back to sleep hopefully without any more nightmares#had to post about it first to make it less scary and less real to me tho 😵💫
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I feel like I will perish if I don't get a hug immediately and guess who's not getting a hug immediately or possibly for quite a while?
#you guessed it it's julian! woo! you get a prize!#faer personal files#i am not well at the moment lol. between the low sleep and the mold and the letting people down like.#if somebody was building me my own torment nexus these would be the ingredience#i just can't like genuinely if something doesn't give idk what's going to happen here. i'm giving it all i've got and it's not enough#is the thing. all i've got isn't enough to make it and it isn't enough to even happily be me!!!#like even if capitalism disappears tomorrow like poof all i've got still isn't fucking enough
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.
#guys somebody pls slap me in the face#i’m falling in love with one of my friends#who literally just got out of a serious relationship#but we were both drunk tonight and he kept making these jokes that we should go home together and ‘don’t test me cause now i’m single’#and god i was sitting in the taxi next to him like PLS KISS ME#especially tonight that we were drunk he was flirting so much with me and it was so hard to stay strong#bye the way he just texted me rn#i need to go to sleep and stfu#good night besties 🫡#alcohol tw
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Evil that at bedtime I feel like I could finish and entire game in one sitting but I know I couldn’t. I’m sleepy but I also feel like I could do anything. And it’s EVIL
#currently feel like I could finish the entire ace attorney series right now#cause my friends keep talking about it#and it’s making me want to finish the games#but I’m also SLEEPY#I would barely make it through one scene I guarantee#plus i also have to be responsible and go to sleep#ugh. so many things to do so little time and energy to do them. somebody invent the time break#to the void#sunnfish.jrnl
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If they didn't want people sleeping during the day they wouldn't have made beds so comfortable
#hi I just woke up and my blankets are so soft and it's the perfect temperature as well and I have so much work that needs to be done#it's a cruel world#I've also lost all concept of time and barely know what day it is but whatever#maybe.... another 20 minutes... what's the worst that could happen#sorry for rambling just woke up with very strong feelings about how comfortable I'm feeling rn#also unrelated to anything I think modern oil paintings are really interesting especially ones that are more realistic and focus on everyda#scenes or still lives#personally I always associate oil painting with very classical art and that comparison brings a whole new layer of appreciation to the#piece like yea you've painted your McDonald's happy meal and hundreds of years ago somebody painted this bowl of fruit#and the medium in which you did it stayed the same the whole time#it's similar to how I feel about (modern) art in museums in that because it's placed in museums it gives it the feeling of an important#art piece and something that you should study intently#love modern art btw don't think it has only value if it's placed in an museum I just think it's interesting how much impact the surrounding#have on what we consider art#which is a fun thing to try out like for example if I say my IKEA chair is art that gives it a different value#making me study it more closely and in the process I'll realise yes it is art to me the way the pieces fit together#how the form was designed etc and it works for everything and makes your day much more fun#ramble over if someone's still reading this here's a fun little guy: 🐕 and sorry for taking up so much space on the dashboard#I'm going to go back to sleep now (bed is still veryyyy comfortable)#delete later
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You are never too much pls continue to keep us updated if u so choose :D hope u were able to get rest and food!!
Thank you, Jed that's nice of you to say 🥺💚
Then I'll keep up the updates when it makes sense x'D
#I did get some sleep and food and it was very nice#it looks to be surprisingly nice weather today as well#although it might start raining later so I'll make sure to have a poncho with me :'D#not much has happened otherwise today#I have drawn today's käärijäprompts and eaten some breakfast#listened to a lot of käärijä in my room#I am thinking about going out for a little walk soon#but at the same time I am waiting for somebody to arrive to meet up so I am not sure if I should go too far xD#we'll see what'll happen :3#replies#tour de käärijä
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Vessel covering That's Okay or Magnolia by The Hush Sound send [redacted]
#sleep token#'you are weathered and worn your petals soft and torn' magnolia my beloved#'and when youre gone will they say your name? and when youre gone will they live you the same?' ahhh#tbh picking Just One Line from That's Okay is difficult go look at the lyrics#'if somebody loved you theyd tell you by now we all turn away when youre down' fucking. oof of a line there. the whole song is like that.#this would. honestly. Probably Ruin Me. i would Definitely cry.#the hush sound is much more. late 2000's soft indie rock so. probably has not heard of them. especially since they dont make music anymore😭
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sometimes your brain just decides to attack you throughout the day and we'll into the night and all you can really do is lay in your bed and be sad about it without really being able to talk to anyone about it to relieve the pressure because it is 5 in the fucking morning.
#personal#Sometimes you want to be brave and address some concerns that have been weighing heavy on your heart for a long time#But then you realize it's one of the people you wanna talk to's birthday and you can't fuck up their birthday with Heavy Shit#But also it seems like every single time you want to say something they've just gone through some new horrible trauma#And so the timing is never right to have that kind of talk#But then you wouldn't know when the right time is anyway because you don't really talk about anything anymore#Which is precisely the thing you want to talk about actually#And you're not sure if you've done something to piss somebody off or if you're just not relevant to them or if you're being neurotic#And so instead of sleeping when you're so so tired you are driven with insomnia induced by the pounding of your heart#It feels like drowning and I know this feeling cause it's an old feeling I know intimately and it's scary feeling it again#It's the overbearing loneliness I lived with when I was at my absolute worst and the thought of slipping into that is making me panic a bit#I might have tachycardia or something too idk man I think my heart skips every once in a while#Anyway I want to vomit#Actually I want to sleep but it feels like I have to expel some emotional bile in order to do that#I need the elephant to get off my chest#I miss my cat#I feel like I'm going crazy I feel like I'm getting kind of bad
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Song of the Day: April 17
"Homemade Music" by Jimmy Buffett
#song of the day#well I said 'if I miss a day this week I'll reset the phone alarm' and then promptly missed the very next day so. alarm it is#by hook or by crook we will get some structure in this god damn sleep schedule#today's song is Homemade Music because Duncan showed me the music video and it is very vintage Jimmy. very fun#yesterday I did have a song picked and now I can't remember what it was for the life of me. something with a sustained vowel sound#Etta James or Florence Welch? Orville Peck? I cannot recall. somebody was wailin though#tomorrow's going to be a hard day to start but it'll finish well. I just gotta make it past lunchtime without the creek rising
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i was so sleepy and ready for bed then i listened to the new green day single and got myself so excited about the tour
#marzi speaks#i’m still gonna go to bed soon but man. i sure am making this whole ‘fix your sleep schedule’ thing difficult for myself#not my fault this time !!! music good#sidenote what genre is green day. are they pop-punk. are they grunge. are they rock#what do they classify as. somebody assist me there please i am so fucking genre blind it’s insane
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i feel like killing myself does anyone else feel like killing themselves
#i wish i could just live alone lmao#i need to eat regularly but i cant make food for myself after work w/o my little brother asking me to make him something else too#which isnt the worst thing but hes 20 he could use the oven literally anytime but he refuses to even try#and my time before+after work is so limited i dont feel like cooking a bunch of extra food for somebody who couldve done it hours ago#and then when i try to plan meals out for my family either he'd rather go to sleep or my mom (knows im cooking and then) leaves the house#AND they both get mad and offended if i order food just for myself BUT ALSO if i order for me+my brother he refuses to eat anything besides#mcdonalds which i hate like. i cant win and im just so sick of being alive#on the one hand my brother would never eat if i didnt make him food/buy him food but on the other hand at what point does it stop being my#responsibility... i'm tired i just wanna live in a world where i only have to look after myself and not worry abt everyone hating me#regardless nothing is appetizing to me anymore and i never have time to eat anyway not to mention money like im just so sick of being alive#[liza minelli cackle]
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